Understanding why I was called here

I have been working in the volunteer business for about two and a half months now, I am learning more than I think I ever could about anything and everything. New Orleans is a fascinating city to do volunteer work in because not only is there a culture that seems to have been built on and for volunteers by Hurricane Katrina, but the city welcomes you with open arms and hearts if you have the time to give to them. Volunteering is one of those things that really allows you to see the true generosity and kindness of the human spirit, not only are you seeing people who are willing to give a year of their lives to help, but also you see a different side of humanity, the truly grateful one.

Volunteering breaks down into two distinct parts at its core; the volunteer and those are being served.

Being a volunteer for a whole year is a truly daunting task, and I never whine because no one ever said this year would be an easy one. I am in a program where we take the time to examine all parts of who we are, it is unique and one I will never get to experience in the rest of my life. Down here in New Orleans, when you say you are a volunteer to anyone who is a local or who has been here since Katrina, the instant response from just about everyone is "Thank you for being here, and if you need anything just call, and God bless you!" I can't tell you how many people I have had say that to me. Whenever I told people up north that I was doing a year of volunteer work, and I would tell them it was in New Orleans, they would say "Good Luck, New Orleans is really needing to be rebuilt." When I got down here, I was always told be just about everyone, we as volunteers are not rebuilding New Orleans, that has been done, we are helping to sustain and heal. Sustain the almost near death city, by helping to provide services like mine which help people who can't always afford a new home, find the resources and be walked through the processes of buying one. Healing the wounds that were opened by Katrina, like what I do within Jericho Road, by working within Neighborhoods trying to get people to break the walls of difference and work together to create a safer place to live. I said earlier that you see through volunteering how truly generous people are; this I have found in two separate terms; people like to help those who volunteer, because they want us to be able to continue doing what we are doing. But also there is a spirit that is drawn out when you volunteer, a generous heart is called upon. You learn how to just forget about the politics of the situation, and just do what needs to be done.

The second distinct part of volunteering is those who you are serving, and those I have found to come in all shapes and sizes. I have heard stories from every type of person down here in New Orleans about how they received help from a volunteer, and how that touched their lives forever (and some of these stories come from before Katrina.) When I came down, I came with judgements about whom I would be serving, I had this assumed identity of the people who truly needed help down here. Then I got here, and realized that I would be helping middle income to low income white people,  let me just say honestly that was not who I anticipated working with. But over the past two months I have heard their stories about how they are desperate for help in revitalizing their neighborhood, how they just want to connect with those who have been living in their neighborhood all their lives. I am also finding out that the web of differences in New Orleans is a complicated one, I can't say how difficult it is to really delve in and figure out why Jim doesn't like John and Judy. But that is not what I am discussing here, I am talking about how my own perceptions of who needs to be helped in New Orleans were fundamentally changed by the work I am doing in Central City. I have also found a newly kindled spirit for the work when I did some very happenstance volunteer work the other night. I was hanging out with my boyfriend the other day, helping him and his friend set up their ritual for Halloween (they are Wiccan,) well it turns out that she works with a church non-profit every Saturday called The Desmond Project, which is an organization that on Saturday makes food for an hour and a half in the kitchen of a local United Methodist Church, and then they take the food and go feed the homeless under the I-10 over pass for two hours. What an experience it was to work with people making food, but then to go and serve it to people who some have not eaten in almost a week. So many smiling faces when started setting up, and all of the truly grateful thank you's and God Bless's when we were serving. One man started crying while he took the food away because that was the first real meal he had had in almost 4 days. When I say, seeing people who are truly grateful for what you are giving them, it was the most heart wrenching thing to do, but it was probably the most enjoyable experience I ever had.

Volunteering has truly become a major part of my life, and I don't think I will ever give it up. I don't think after this experience I will be able to, I will always be doing volunteer work in some way, probably not for another whole year, but definitely on a part-time basis. I don't usually say this, but I think that God has truly shown me what my destined work is for my life. I am a volunteer!

Also on a side note, I would love to see comments more often, just like knowing who is reading my posts. I only know how many of y'all are reading them, not who. Even a short post is cool.

Well peace on earth y'all! 

Refreshed Idealism

I realized tonight that I am not really updating this as much as I should be updating it. I apologize for that.

So Tuesday was a very eventful day for me at Jericho Road, we had our first real event as fellows in community organizing. Tuesday was "Night Out Against Crime" in New Orleans, what this is a national night where communities get together and sit outside and talk about the issues of crime and violence in their neighborhoods. For us as community organizers that meant we had to organize events in our neighborhoods, some of had block parties, and big events with some of the local churches. My neighborhood decided to just partner with two separate sites in the area; the local police station, and the Youth Leadership Council. Both sites were heavily attended by our residents, each had free food, lots of music, and many other organizations from around the area. I had to as the neighborhood coordinator be the point person making sure that both sites had materials, the spots reserved, tables and chairs to sit at, as well as making sure people were there to sit at the tables the whole time of the event.

Me sitting with a few board members, I don't look excited, but I am.

This was my first real experience in event planning, resident coordinating, and really being a leader for a large group of people, and even to a certain extent mass marketing. It was a tiring but exhilarating experience at the same time, I loved being out doing something, making posters, sitting at the tables talking to all the people about the wonderful neighborhood association that I was representing. I even got a compliment from one of the other neighborhood association coordinators that it was nice to see so much material out on the table and that she was impressed that I made half of the materials. It was the first time since arriving at Jericho Road, that I was excited about my job, not that I wasn't before, but I was starting to get burnt out a bit just talking about all these events, and having endless meetings about them. It was nice to see the final product playing out and talking to residents and hearing their enthusiasm to join the association. I was complimented by so many people at both sites, many saying it was so nice to see a young person with so much investment in a community of people.

It was also the first time I felt like I was being treated like a responsible adult and that people were respecting me for the job that I was doing. I liked meeting all of these people whom I can work with on future events in the neighborhood and it was refreshing to talk to residents about all of the plans that I had to work with them on. My idealism that I came here to New Orleans was refreshed by this experience, I came to work this morning with tons of ideas for new events that I want to propose to the Board of my association and to call up residents and get working on. Just a few little teasers of ideas I am thinking about doing would be upcoming for Halloween, I am planning "Safe Routes" for trick-or-treating, as well as a Halloween party with kids and some of the senior citizens in the area. In November I am planning a food drive to help the local Mission that is in my neighborhood. Lots of plans and ideas in my head have swirling around I am trying to catch them all and get proposals ready for my supervisor, so we can start fleshing them out with our residents. I am sure as the year moves along I will be excitedly be talking more and more about my upcoming events.

Well until I update again,

Peace!

Gay Reaction To Homophobia

I have been out of the closet now for about 6 years, I came out within my first year of college (I mean my one and only year at BGSU.) I came out into a completely accepting community of people who with open minds and hearts accepted my coming out of the closet with open arms and where always available to talk about my being gay when ever I needed to. I am out to my parents and my immediate family, while they are still learning how to accept it into the life force of the family, they have come to accept me for who I am, mostly because family in itself has the innate structure of unconditional love. It took me some time before I was fully able to just say "fuck it, you can take me or leave me, I am who I am and that is all that matters." I don't hide my sexuality to anyone, I am also one who doesn't advertise, (i.e. I don't walk into a room and say "guess who is the gay one here,") mostly because that is just obnoxious. I am not one to censor what I am thinking our what I say, even if I don't say a whole lot.

This is all leading to a point I promise. Last weekend, I had my first real bout with homophobia, and it involved my and my new boyfriend, while we were walking holding hands in the French Quarter. Here is what happened, me, Tony (my boyfriend), and his friend were walking through the French Quarter from one bar to another, talking admittedly pretty loud about some pretty lewd things (but only in the sense of making fun of the stuff, and pointing out it's stupidity), anyway, we were walking behind this couple, and all of a sudden the man turns around, looks down at Tony and I holding hands, and says "You're being too loud." First of all in the French Quarter one can not be too loud, it is basically impossible. Secondly, we all watched him look down at Tony and I, it was pretty obvious he was not making a point about our volume level. Let me just say it out loud to those not aware of what I am discussing; this was a homophobic action.

While this wasn't a blatant statement, and he admittedly didn't say anything like "I don't think you two should be holding hands," it was still obvious that he was irritated with the fact that he was being followed by a loud gay couple. I guess my point of this story is that if you are uncomfortable with two people holding hands and showing affection for each other, then you should find a more discreet way of avoiding it. I have a feeling though that if I was with a girl holding hands, the man probably wouldn't have made the comment that he did. But alas I cannot make that assumption. I just feel that if you are going to make a statement, then don't make it obvious that the volume is what you are really offended by, at least have the balls to make the homophobic comment that is really on your mind. I mean I really doubt it would have made a difference to me either way, but off handed homophobia is just another reason why PC attitudes in this country are messed up.

I am sorry for ranting about this situation, and I am aware that I am only really arguing about one side of this situation, I am just reacting to a problem that I keep seeing in this country all the time.

So that is my update on this blog and I hope y'all who are reading this are enjoying reading what I am really thinking about all of the time. Also I would love a comment once in a while just to know that I am not talking to myself.

Peace. 

I'm a Preacher's Kid

For those who weren't aware I was in fact a preachers kid, or a better known term a PK, I grew up my entire life in the church, the United Methodist Church to be specific. While I was growing up, my parents taught me how to speak about religion and Christianity intellectually, making sure I knew what I was talking about when I was referencing the Bible, or talking about different aspects of Christianity. It goes on to say that if you know me at all you know that I have strong opinions about not only the Christian Church but all of organized religion in general. I don't advocate towards blindly going to church and not really understanding or caring what the meaning is behind why you are going. I also don't really enjoy hearing older people who go to conferences or discussions about religion quoting every piece of literature that they have found about the Bible, Christianity, or theology in general. In fact that actually annoys me more then blind faith. It's not that I don't like those who like to fully understand what it is they are believing, I just don't like when it is all of the pious crap, trying to show off that they have read the Bible.

Here is my opinion, there is a difference between reading the Bible, studying the various theologies of Christianity and reading different literary works on Jesus. But if you are doing this all so that you can have dialogue, and then on top of that you aren't really acting like a true Christian, then I don't really want to argue your Bullshit research. Because theological discourse is not necessarily about being able to argue biblical context intellectually. No, you need to be following what the Bible is actually teaching. Pious Jesus talk is not necessarily making you a good christian, just because you go to church every Sunday, and you think you have a "relationship" or a "love" for Jesus, doesn't make you a Christian, when you are walking around judging others, and not really taking the time to engage your fellow man.

This ranting on my religious annoyances comes out of a day and a half conference that I attended called "Let Love Rule," essentially where we spent the whole time discussing or rather listening about how the monastics would say we should live with love. The problem was not the content for me, I loved the speaker, she made many great points, it was the audience that was participating in the discussion. First of all the conference was held in possibly the richest part of New Orleans, secondly the audience was for the most part elderly people, or those who consider themselves to be holy church going folks. Basically what I am getting at was that the content didn't resonate with the audience like it would if for example this conference was being held in a lower-income area, or maybe with a more youthful vibe. I am 90% sure that our group of LWP folks and the Presbyterian Young Adult Service group were the youngest attending the conference. To me, the whole idea of the conference was a waste of time, because we essentially spent 5 hours listening to older people showing off how much they thought they knew about the Bible and the original church fathers. I was fighting my inner preachers kid the entire time to not pull out a Bible and have those making the pious claims, to prove themselves.

Well anyway, I think I have ranted enough about my annoyances with Christianity on the pious level,

Peace. 

Growing Up

I have been volunteering now with the Episcopal Service Corps for almost a month and a half, I was recently told 8 weeks. I have been having a blast down here in NOLA exploring what I will be calling home. But I am also learning what it means to have a full time job and actually be considered an adult in the work place, coming up with ideas that will have an impact on not only the organization but also my neighborhood which I am serving as part of my job. I think that this is probably the single hardest transition I have ever had to make, the process of going from being a full time student to being a full time volunteer/person in the workforce.

I feel like I am learning this process in a more unique way than most, because I am doing volunteer work through a program, which means that not only am I working, but I also have to live within a community of volunteers, walk through the different meetings and activities that the program offers, and find some way of balancing a social life in there some where. Balance has been a word I have used and heard frequently in the past few weeks, balancing my life is important. I know, to most that would sound obvious, like that is not a new revelation, but moving through this transition into a more adult role in my life has brought the idea of balance into a totally different light. One comfort I can take in this whole experience is that I am not walking this path alone, the others who are also in the program are also making these same realizations that I am. I would say there are most definitely three types of growing in life; high school, college, and post-grad adulthood. I have hit that point where I am trying to decipher the complexities of becoming an actual adult.

 I have learned a lot since coming to NOLA and I feel like I could not have picked a better place to grow up and find myself as an adult. I think that going across the country to do my year of service was a good choice, because while I am here I don't have the temptation of running to my parents every time I have a problem, or when I need comfort or money...haha. So now I am left to my own devices on how to solve the problems that I would usually go running to my parents with. I also don't have the luxury of calling them everyday, which only occurred really to me this week when I realized that I had not talked to my mom in almost three or four days. I mean I email with my Dad but that is not the same as hearing the voice of my parents and talking with them about my everyday ordeals. Growing up is an adventure that I am still riding, and learning all of the twists and turns of different aspects of my life that I have had to adjust or just flat out change. I think what will be the most interesting thing after this experience, will be to see where I end up, will I stay here in NOLA or will I look to find the next step in my life? I think that is a question that I must leave up to God, because while I have my ideas, God is the only one who truly knows my life path. But I guess until then, I will just have to continue on with this roller coaster I call growing up into adulthood.

Well till next time,

Peace

NOLA and the South

I took another trip to the French Quarter today, and I went into the State Museum of Louisiana at New Orleans, as well as the National World War II and Confederate Civil War Museums. I really felt like I needed to replenish the history loving personality that drove my degree. Well I learned so much about the different aspects of New Orleans that I have a lot to say about this city and its relationship to the rest of the south.

If you were to ask any New Orleanian if they were a southerner, they would probably tell you know, they are a New Orleanian. The people of NOLA don't have southern accents, conservative views on national politics, and it is probably the most accepting city of different cultures, sexual orientations, races, and religions of any of the southern cities. One of the main reasons that there is such a difference between NOLA and the rest of the south, even a difference between NOLA and the rest of Louisiana, is primarily because NOLA has always been a port city. Being a port city, New Orleans was on the cusp of the cutting edge, the avant garde, and the politically different. I mean one can see this in that there is a clear difference between those who identify as Creole and as African American, or even those who are a WASP and those who are Cajun. Since its founding in 1718 as a French port settlement, New Orleans has accepted all kinds of people, from pirates to French Quebecois fleeing British Canada, to Gays and African Americans. These people are pretty resilient to new types of people moving in and out of their city. The husband of the deacon helping with our program said to us "the people here don't care what you do, how you do it, or where you're from, as long as you're not boring."

Where am I going with this, well I am trying to say that while New Orleans resembles a southern city, in how it handles politics, social hierarchy. The people are fundamentally different in terms of how they tolerate all that happens in their city, they have a style about them, they are half implants, and full of the saying "Laissez Les Bon Temps Rouler." I almost feel as though when they hear someone say it from the outside, it gets annoying, because they know deep inside that they do truly live that saying. Style is an important thing, and having fun is the second most important, coming very close to eating and food. New Orleanians take pride in the fact that they have a massive food culture, extending far beyond the new "foodie" movements happening up north. Food has always been engrained who the New Orleanians know themselves as.

Much of the business and politics happening in New Orleans happens at social functions and at food events, Mardi Gras Krewes hold more power in this city as a social order then any other in the United States. I learned at the State Museums, that Krewes were formed back in the 1700's by the higher ups of NOLA as a form of Nobility to greet those of noble blood from other countries. Having what are called Rex Kings, or kings for a day, who have a Rex court and all, they celebrate their rule on the two days before Mardi Gras, but are selected after January 6th when the season before lent begins. These Krewes became popular as social organizations of the higher classes of NOLA, later forming as social groups throughout the city. Then around 1809 the African American and Creole of NOLA being angry from being left out of these pretentious organizations formed the order of the Zulu, which was intentionally mocking the Rex Krewes, but now hold just as much significance as the Rex Krewes. These Krewes hold parties throughout the year trying to gain more and more influence from the politics and business types of the upper echelons of NOLA society, (essentially if you want to be elected in NOLA, you need to schmooze to the Krewes.)

New Orleans society and politics is basically backwards from what one thinks they know about southern society, here just because you have money doesn't mean you have power in this city. Here a krewe can rule the city merely because they have a lot of affluence in the city, and they have many members throughout the city. I think in many ways that is what keeps drawing me to the city, everyday I have to learn something new about how the this city functions, because it is unlike anywhere I have ever been. Anything I have ever learned about society from the north, is all thrown through a loop here in NOLA, nothing makes sense sometimes, because they seem to do everything with their own style and personality.

Well I must end this post about NOLA for now. So until next time.

Peace!  

One Month Already, so many adventures!

When I was working on my internship in Washington D.C. one of the first things they told us during our orientation was "Be a tourist in your city." Now at the time that was said because we were their for only a short time (3 1/2 months) so we had no choice but to explore the city. What I am getting at in relation to my experiences in New Orleans, is that for the first time last weekend I was a tourist in my own city, I went to the French Quarter for the first time during the day. It was actually fun being a tourist, I found myself just wandering the streets of FQ just admiring the architecture, perusing in and out of the little shops that line the streets. I went to the Voodoo museum, which I had read about in books, and it was interesting to finally see what I had been reading about. 

I don't know what it was about being a tourist, but I found it strangely relaxing to just view all of the sites of the city that I have been living in for almost a month now. Which leads me to my next point of interest, I have been in NOLA for a month, and has the time flew by, it still feels weird or strange to call this place home. I am having a hard time calling it the city of New Orleans, because when one walks through the streets of NOLA, it doesn't read like a city, but rather a very large small town (I know oxymoron, but that is Louisiana in general.) Learning how this city operates, is much akin to trying to learn how to read a map in a foreign country where the map is all written in their language. Each day at work, I feel I find out some new strange custom or law which just makes me turn my head and think "that is so backwards." Then again I have come to just being saying to myself every time I hear something backwards, "only in Louisiana," or "it would happen like that in New Orleans." One has to understand that I mean this with the same affection as when I would always say "only in Erie," or "Gannon would do things like that."

Through a strange happenstance I have started meeting new people that live around us, finally starting to get to know some people who are not from my work or from LWP (Living With Purpose.) While I have only known them a week, I feel like it will be nice to have a place to crash when I am tired of work or LWP people, I love being around everyone, but sometimes it is nice to have others to talk to. These are just some random ramblings that I have thought about since the last time I updated. But I am ready to sign off till next time.

Peace.