Finding Faith

I don't normally talk about religion all that much, because for the past 10 years I really just stopped going to church. I stopped because I became tired how a social hierarchy and stigma has formed with religion, people don't go because they want to retain their relationship with God, and have meditative discourse with Christ. Mostly I see people going because an older relative is making them go, or because they think it is the right thing to do, which means they are speaking the words and singing the songs but not truly understanding or feeling the meaning behind any of it. Every time I attend a church service no matter the denomination, I try and listen to the sermon and read the passages and sing the songs trying very hard to feel God's presence in the service. I don't really pay much attention to what I am wearing because I highly doubt God nor Jesus has any interest in what shirt I decided to wear to Church that particular Sunday.

Since coming down to New Orleans I have been doing a lot of intense thinking/learning about the meaning of faith and walking with the grace of God. We talk about how faith and religion are two entirely separate entities, and speak about God as if he is our father and friend that we go to see every week. We talk about how he is watching over us and making sure we do not fall or make major mistakes, while allowing us to make decisions on our own. Many times I hear people speaking about God as if he is merely there to clean up after our mess or grant our every wish. God is not a genie, and he is definitely not our mother.

Another aspect of the faith orientation down here in New Orleans, is the idea that we should be grounded in our faith backgrounds. This means for me going back and re-looking at my complicated relationship with the United Methodist Church. My first step to understanding was talking to my father about the United Methodist Church, asking many questions about our differences with other denominations, our specific traditions, the history of the church, and different theologies which came with the creation of the MC (for example; if your ever interested look up "Methodist Quadrilateral" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wesleyan_Quadrilateral). There is so much I am learning about myself spiritually, which I was really hoping I would be doing while I was down here. For the first time in my life I am actually excited about attending church on a regular basis.